tampered | Log: Ongoing

Log: Ongoing

When; Friday 13th June [Evening]
Rating; PG at most
Characters; Anakin Skywalker [

coercible] and Padmé Amidala [

__amidala__]
Summary; Back from his time away, Anakin finally decides it's time to answer some of those questions that Padmé's been asking. It's time for a little Q&A between the loving couple.
Log;
Eleven days.

Eleven days spent away from the people he cared about. All that time spent trying to order his thoughts and he still wasn't sure he'd managed to. But there was only so long he could keep away. Especially with everything else that was happening at the moment. It wasn't fair on the others for him to abandon them like he had. And so he'd returned.

He'd managed to put it off for longer than he had thought; a conversation about the future, and all in entailed. It wasn't something he particularly wanted to talk about, but he knew the conversation needed to happen. For Padmé, for him, for each of the others. But he still hadn't made any attempt to seek her out for the conversation. It would happen, he just didn't know when.

He was sat cross-legged on the floor, a myriad of pieces of machinery scattered around him. Had this been ten years ago, the sight wouldn't have been all that uncommon in the halls of the Jedi Temple. Though where they were pieces of droids, these were the components of a small repulsorlift engine. The same one that had been sat in the apartment a few weeks ago. He'd returned earlier that day to collect the parts, in search of something else he could use to distract himself. Only this time, it would be more productive.

Hunched over a small piece of metal, Anakin was absorbed in his work, using it to keep his mind clear from all that had plagued him the past weeks. Another turn of the hand and a piece fell away, joining the rest of the mess. Organised mess, of course. Without looking, a hand reached out for a component sat behind him, and he was fixing it in place quickly. This was so much simpler than anything else he'd faced recently.

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A pair of brown eyes observed him silently from the doorway. She hadn’t been expecting back for sometime since he hadn’t really told her of a set date. But stumbling upon him as she did, to see him working on something, it was a somewhat familiar scene to her. She didn’t want to disturb him yet.

She started to think about what they had discussed thus far and what was left to discuss. The unanswered questions that would soon be answered or so she hoped. Slowly she approached with her arms crossed, looking over his shoulder.

"What are you fixing, today?"

It was a testament as to how engrossed he was in his work that Padmé managed to remain that close without him feeling her presence. When he finally did register that she was nearby, a smile grew on his face. She always seemed to make him feel comfortable, no matter what was happening. It'd been the same when she'd visited him in the forest earlier that week. And he was sure that it wouldn't change. Not until-

No, no focusing on that right now. "Overall, it is an engine. But this piece-" He looked up toward her, moving his hands clear from the bundle in his lap. "-this is to aid in the control of the energy output." The pieces to his side were swiped away, clearing space amongst the mess. A small grimace at the marked left in their wake and Anakin pulled over his cloak, spreading it over the grease stains for her to join him.

"I was contemplating building another racer."

She listened on remaining rooted in place, her gaze falling on the piece. This wasn’t her element, but she always found it interesting. "Another racer? Well this place could use it." Or rather he could certainly use it. It’d be much easier to get around than on foot at least and it would be nice to see something that was more familiar with her home around. Not that the food she had found so far hadn’t been somewhat comforting but it hadn’t been a vehicle. The only other vehicle she knew of and had ridden in was Sam’s Vespsa but that was still foreign to her. A speeder wouldn't be.

Moving slightly over, she sat on the cloth, Indian style, not bothered by the clutter that surrounded them. She reached over to pick up a small cylinder shaped piece not at all bothered by the marks it left on her hand. She studied it for a moment, contemplating what to say next. What to ask…

"Ani," she looked at him and then paused. "You said you would answer about...Naboo."

He watched her from the corner of his eye, even as he continued fixing another component in to place. Most of it came second nature to him; it always had, ever since he was a child. And he enjoyed doing it. He doubted that would ever change. There was something relaxing about working on machinery. Every action came with an obvious reason and consequence. Here, he always knew what to do and how to fix things. A vast change from life outside of his actions.

At the question, he finally stopped working, staring down at the mess of metal. He'd known this would be one of the first questions she'd ask. She'd tried already, on a number of occasions, to find out what had happened. And each time he'd tried to avoid answering. He'd been convinced that it was better that she didn't know. But now he'd promised to try to answer as many questions as he could. He'd give her an actual answer now.

"We went to Naboo shortly after Geonosis so that we could be alone. Others would not agree with our actions there. Both the public and the Order." He paused, looking back over toward her, wanting to gauge her reaction. What held true for him hadn't already happened for her. He wouldn't blame her if she reacted badly to the news. "In my time, we are married. That is why we returned to Naboo."

The piece of metal fell from her hand at hearing the revelation. They were married? They...Anakin and her...It wasn’t what she expected to hear. Her eyes stayed on him, but it was like she was in a whole other world still processing this news. She should have suspected it but rationality nagged at her that there had been some other reason for them going. Perhaps a sick family member or...Something else but certainly not this.

Finally the Senator blinked and broke the silence that had overtaken her. "We’re married..." Her voice trailed off as she started thinking again. They had gone against the rules, everything in the future it seemed. One that still had not taken place for her yet. She could only imagine how their life would be like always in hiding. "I," she was looking at him now still a bit shocked but not displeased. "...see." Really Padmé was at a loss for words which was so unlike her.

"...And no one knows?" She started to wonder about her family. If they knew. They probably didn’t with the way that he had put it but she needed to know.

"In my time." He was trying his best to defuse the situation somewhat. It may've been the past for him, but these were events that Padmé hadn't witnessed yet. There were only weeks between the time she came from and the time he spoke of, but things weren't as clear cut as that any more. The City had changed everything.

"Only the two of us, the Pontifex, Artoo, and Threepio know. It was not wise to allow others the knowledge." They would've both been looked down on. Padmé's position was too important for her to be superseded because of a single choice. "...is it truly a bad thing?"

[ooc: Sorry for the slow/lame/stuff. D=]

His time, she thought. Reminding herself of that one single fact. Currently she wasn’t married but it would happen eventually. There was nothing that could stop it. Not that she would’ve wanted anything to stop it since she did love him. But still to hear that she would marry him and only a select few would know of it was...well shocking.

Silence once again and she looked past him for a moment. There was bit of hesitation in her response."...No, it is not." It really wasn’t. "This is going to take some time to sink in, Ani." She admitted her gaze falling on him, with a serious expression.

She started to wonder about Luke. If he had finally found out how they were related, but should she ask? Did she really want to know? She wasn’t sure.

He did his best to extend a calming feeling toward her. Even to the most prepared of people, knowing your future wasn't ever an easy thing to understand. And so far, it'd only been one, simple fact. How would she react if she knew even a fraction of the things Luke had told him already? Time alone in the forest, days of meditation, talk upon talk with those who knew his fate. These worked out for him, for a Jedi, but he knew it wouldn't be the same for her.

"It does not change what has already happened, here. My feelings toward you are the same in your time as they are in mine." Albeit, a lot stronger. "Our marriage does not need to be a factor in our time here." Wiping his hand semi-clean, Anakin gave a gentle smile to her. Slowly, carefully, he reached said hand out toward her, taking hers in his. A gentle squeeze and, "You only need to know that I love you."

[ooc: ♥~ I'm half-dead right now, so there may not be tags till I'm back from work, again. =/]

Padmé focused on him and then on their joined hands. There was a sense of comfort there. She squeezed it back, smiling at him. There were other things that she needed to know, wanted to know, but to hear that he loved her, this past version of her that wasn’t his wife, it put those questions on hold for just a moment.

"Ani, I-"

She paused knowing that she loved him even if he wasn’t the same person from her time. But after everything that had happened in the City thus far, it was hard for her not to feel the way she did. "I love you too."

But again there were questions. He did promise to answer more than one. And so the Senator just stared, and without wasting anymore time started to ask…

"Did Luke ever tell you, how he is related to you?"

Another question he knew to expect, but this was no less easier to answer. In fact, it was a topic more delicate than the one they had just been on. How much of her own future was it safe for her to know? If all the theories were correct, then any knowledge she gained now wouldn't follow her back home. If they were wrong, then he would retain his own knowledge in return and their combined futures could be changed.

"...he has." How exactly was he meant to break it to her? Does he evade? Does he flat out tell her? All he knew was that he'd have to be there for her, once she found out. He wasn't about to go anywhere until she told him to.

"He is from twenty-six years in to your future. In my time, he shall be born in a few months. His mother- There was a short squeeze of her hand. "-shall be telling her husband soon. When he returns from war."

[ooc: ♥! Don't worry. LJ's been being evil for the whole week. =/]

Edited 2008-06-19 06:17 (UTC)

The more he spoke, the more it was starting to fall into place. They both had the same last name and resembled each other a bit. And now with that bit of new information, it was all becoming clear. She felt his hand squeeze hers and that just confirmed it further. She stared past him again, some color leaving her face as she realized the connection. Luke was his…Their son? And he hadn’t even spoken it, didn’t need to. So then this meant that Leia was theirs as well?

"He’s your...Our son." She said still not being able to look at him, still taking this all in. But then if Leia was theirs as well why would she be raised by Bail and not her? Not them together? There was that uneasiness that started to creep up again at what could have happened to leave those two with such a fate. It wasn’t good. Her grip started to slip from his.

He wouldn't let it happen. He wouldn't let her cut herself off because of this. No matter how big the information was, he wasn't going to leave her to handle it himself. At least when he'd been told, he'd already had some idea of it all. The Force had guided him through their conversation, reinforcing the truth behind it all. For Padmé though, she didn't have that connection. He couldn't reassure her the same way Luke had reassured him.

"Stay with me." His grip re-tightened around her hand, all but refusing to let go. "It remains in the future. For now, there is nothing that can be done about it." There's as much comfort and support as he can muster being directed toward her through the Force. She may not be a user, but that wasn't going to stop him from trying. "Padmé?"

She heard his words and felt the grip but there was no real reaction to it as the Senator became lost in her thoughts, becoming completely silent, still. She took in a breath, not being able to look at him. There was just this blank look to her eyes, as she started to form her own conclusion going by her last talk with Luke on the beach. Her children…She would have never abandoned them. No matter what was happening. If something had happened why couldn’t they have been raised on Naboo? Why were they split up? Why...Why...Where...Her mind was just a jumbled mess and she took another shaky breath.

"I..." Her voice trailed off as her eyes fell back on him, still lost.

"Why...why didn't we raise them?"

It was a question he didn't want to answer, but also one that he couldn't leave unknown. He wanted nothing more than to say she was wrong. That they had all stayed together as one, happy family. But she knew about Bail Organa. She knew that Luke and Leia had grown up separately. How was he meant to keep the real reason from her?

He shifted, moving round so he could place an arm around Padmé. He wanted to make this all easier for her; easier to hear. But he didn't know how. "...it was too much for you." He chose his words carefully, not wanting to lie to her, but not wanting to tell her the complete truth either. "You gave your life so that they could live. Our children. You are the reason that they were able to survive." He was holding on to her tightly by now, not wanting to let go.

The answer was something that she feared of her future given the little that she had heard but now there was confirmation. She was dead. Died during childbirth. Inside she was panicking, screaming. It just couldn’t be. Their future of the things that were to come couldn’t possibly be that dark could it? If that was her fate then where was he? Had he died as well? The war was still going on in his time as far as she knew, despite his reassurances that it would soon end. It was the one shred of sense, though bleak but she couldn’t voice it. Everything was just so heavy at the moment.

She leaned into him, burying her head against his arm, fighting back tears but it was difficult given the news. She didn’t want to think anymore, didn’t want to speak. "Ani," she said softly her voice almost to the point of breaking, "I..." She choked out, wrapping her other hand around him as tears streamed down her face. More words refused to form and all that was left of her now just a sobbing mess against him.

Edited 2008-06-20 07:15 (UTC)

It hurt more than he'd expected. To she her breaking down like this. But what else could he have foreseen happening? To be told that you were going to die, that someone knew the exact day it would happen, and that there was no way to stop it. She may've been brining two children in to the world, but she wouldn't be able to be there for them from then on out. ... She gives up.

"Padmé, I'm sorry." Because honestly, what else could he say? She was the one thing in his life that he wanted to protect, more than anyone else. And now he was breaking the news to her that he'd failed her. That she was going to die, no matter what they did. "You don't deserve any of this. You should've been with them." She shouldn't have been hurt in the first place. Especially not by him.

And more tears came and she was whimpering. She just left them behind just like that. Unable to help it, it seemed. She kept reminding herself to breath, as she tried to compose herself enough to start a sentence, something that wouldn’t just break off half way through with tears. She clutched onto him tighter with her head still down. "Ani, you don’t need to apologize." He had no blame in her death as far as she knew. Just because it was too much for her, it meant that anything could have happened. She felt awful enough and she didn’t want to drag him down with her, though it really couldn’t be helped now with this news.

Things happen, happened already and they couldn’t be changed could they? Even though she wanted to. Oh how she wanted to now more than ever. "Where...w-where were you? Did you also...die?" Again the war flashed briefly in her mind. It was just starting from the point that she had come from.

By now, Anakin was all but tucked around her, in an attempt to 'protect' her. It hurt to see her cry. But he knew that it was only natural in the situation. She needed a way to let it out, and his own methods wouldn't work for her.

He turns silent again as she speaks, barely even breathing. If she'd known the full story, her opinion would've changed. She wouldn't have a reason to trust him again. Ever. He'd like to believe it was because it was the lesser of two evils. But in truth, he just didn't want to have to tell her the full truth. He didn't want to have failed her twice. Stick to Luke's words right now-

"I did. A short time before."

[ooc: AHah, fail. I keep shifting between log and spam. 8D;;]

Edited 2008-06-20 10:19 (UTC)

And to hear that made it all the more worse. She wasn’t about to ask when or how. She couldn’t. The knowledge that she had received tonight as dreadful and horrible as it was, was just enough. And she didn’t even want to start thinking of her being alone in some hospital giving birth to them. It was just…She gripped onto him tighter as if just holding on would somehow ease her.

She picked her head up to look at him, attempting to stop the tears. She wished that she could change things. It just wasn’t fair. And now it was her turn to apologize but for what reason she did not know. It just felt right to say so.

"I’m so sorry, Ani."

Edited 2008-06-20 17:10 (UTC)

"No, don't say that." Apologies were the last thing she ever needed to direct toward him. Especially not because of this. "This is a future that should not occur." Or at least one specific part of it. Her safety was one of the only things that mattered to him. It always had been. He couldn't point out to her that it was that very reason that may've caused all of this in the first place. The Code had warned against attachments.

"Knowing this now, it...gives you another opportunity. One you wont have, when the time comes." He was thinking of their children now. They may've all been around the same age now, but that didn't change much in his eyes. It'd given him a chance to meet the people their children would grow up in to. And now, Padmé would be given the same chance. "There is a positive that comes from all this too."

It shouldn’t occur, she agreed silently. Yes. But it didn’t mean that it wasn’t going to happen. Especially once they left the City. From what she had heard, you went back exactly to the point you were taken from in most cases and with no memories of this place. Like it never even existed. "But it will," she reminded knowing that things could not be changed. All they really had was here and now.

She was still in his arms, listening and then nodding. A chance...They were both adults now though and who knew what they were told of her fate. But maybe, just maybe she could get to know them now even if she forgot later. And then she remembered something else that Luke had said, so perhaps it wasn’t as bleak. "They end the war..." She wouldn’t be there to see it, but it didn’t mean that she wouldn’t be proud of them, at least for the moment.

Above all else right then he wanted a way to disagree with her. It would mean that there would be the possibility of keeping Luke and Leia's past clear from his and Padmé's future. It's be a chance of remaining as a family this time round. But their combined presences were proof enough that their future was already set. It had happened, and it would happen again.

"A different war." There was a pause as he caught himself, realising what he'd just implied. Yes, it was a completely different war from the Clone Wars, but it was still another conflict to come in their galaxy. "They stopped it. And now, they shall improve the galaxy for each living creature within it."

[ooc: Gah, sorry! My laptop was overheating, so I had to shutdown.]

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Log: Ongoing

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