tampered | sing me to sleep [closed log]

sing me to sleep [closed log]

WHO: Ryan Atwood and Summer Roberts
WHERE: Casa O.C.
WHEN: Late Sunday night.
WARNINGS: talk of nightmares and some adorable cuddling?

Sleep hasn't been coming easy to Summer. Ever since the sky had been filled with crazy, scary flying monsters, Summer had found it hard to sleep. But when she does sleep, lately, nightmares assault her slumber. And tonight is no exception.

Her expression tight, her brows draw together. Her hands, which she holds close to her body, are shaking slightly, fingers closing into tight fists. A sound then wavers from her, a groan that turns into a whimper. Her fingers begin to turn white, knuckles tight as the fetal position she's pulled herself into becomes more closed. The next sound that emerges from her then was closer to a loud sob.

"Don't-" She cries out, choking the word out. "…don't touch him. Don't - !" And a moment a small shriek bursts from her, followed by a sob, and a haunting mantra falling from her lips - "Don't leave me, don't leave me, don't leave me--"

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Ryan is a fairly light sleeper so when Summer cries out, it jerks him out of sleep. He pushes himself out of bed, grabs a baseball bat on his way out of the room and heads blindly toward Summer's room. Once inside it's quickly evident that there's nothing there so he drops the bat and moves toward the bed where Summer is curled into a ball. He drops to his knees, hands going to Summer's shoulders.

"Hey, Summer. It's okay. Wake up."

She's shaking, trembling, as she seems to struggle against an invisible force, an enemy who isn't there. Her words are a jumble, barely audible as she pleads "Please-- Please, don't take him!" But it's when she feels two solid hands on her shoulders, her eyes shoot open, looking directly into his. The air flies out of her shakily, and she chokes some back in, her eyes darting around the room, tiny tears sliding from them. "R-Ryan?"

"It's me." He wipes a tear across her cheek with the pad of his thumb and tucks her hair behind on ear. His other hand is still on her shoulder. "You're okay now."

She whimpers with embarrassment, her eyes fluttering shut at his touch because it's soothing but at the same time she feels bad for waking him up. But more than anything, her heart is pounding, her breathing a little labored. "'m sorry."

"Nah, my night was too quiet." He creeps up to sit on the edge of the bed as he smooths a hand over her hair and down her back.

She just... bursts into tears, pressing her face into the pillow. She's been holding them back for so long, the tears, but now she's too tired to do anything but cry.

If Ryan's protective instincts and need to fix it weren't already in high gear the tears would have pushed them there. He slides further onto the bed, gathering Summer up in his arms as best he can, one hand sliding up and down her back while he runs his fingers through her hair with the other hand.

She twists into his arms, crying softly into his shoulder for just a moment before she shakes her head, trying to get a grip on it, on herself. She didn't want to be crying, she didn't want to be weak. But all she can do is slide her arms around him, molding her body to his as she just tries to breathe.

Ryan isn't one for talking and even less when someone is crying. He never knows what to say so he continues to stroke her back and her hair, turning his head to press a kiss against the top of her head. He threads his fingers through her hair, resting his hand against the back of her neck.

"Just let it all out."

He knows she's been holding it in for a while and he doesn't see the point in it right now. It's not as if he's going to judge her.

"I--" Her voice is trembling, a soft mumble against his shoulder, "I don't want to." But despite that, she's still crying, tears rolling down her cheeks. The nightmares always ended the same, her alone, Ryan torn from her and off to some horrible fate. Gone like Coop. Gone like her mother. Gone like Cohen and Taylor.

"D-Don't leave me."

Oh. That's what this was about. Ryan is a little surprised; not at Summer's fear of being abandoned, he's surprised that her fear is of him leaving. He would have thought she would re-live Seth going over again.

He shakes his head slowly. "I'm not going anywhere, Roberts. You're stuck with me."

And at this point there's a part of him that doesn't want to go anywhere, not unless he can take Summer with him. He doesn't want to leave her alone. He bites his bottom lip, considering something. "Sit up. I need to go grab something out of my room."

She's already been re-living that. Cohen was no where to be found and she had to assume that he was gone. Taylor too. It was just her and Ryan against the world. And sometimes she didn't feel strong enough to do it.

His words make her whimper a little as she holds him just a little tighter. But when he tells her to sit up, that he needs to get something, she blinks. "O-Okay...?"

She moves, slowly to sit up, her body feeling heavy from exhaustion.

Ryan scoots out from Summer and pads into this room. He returns within moments holding a pocket knife. He sits back down on the bed and scoots close to her. He holds his left hand open, palm up. "See that scar? I was 8 so Trey was 11. Mom and Dad were...fighting." Which is code for drunk and beating on each other. Obviously. "I was scared and Trey promised he'd never leave me. He'd take care of me no matter what happened. We cut our palms, pressed them together and promised."

Never mind that things with Trey hadn't worked out so well. His brother had tried. Sort of. Or at least Ryan liked to think he had.

Summer sits up and watches him leave, disappearing into the darkness of the hall between their bedrooms. The house was too big now, too empty. And she was acutely aware of it every time she came home. But she didn't want to leave it. She draws her knees up to her chest just as he returns to the room with a knife. "You're not going to go all psycho and stab me are you, Atwood?" It's a lame attempt at lightening the mood.

But he speaks as he sits down next to her, showing her his palm. She reaches for his hand and brings it closer to her face, catching sight of the palm. Her eyes flicker to his when he tells her the story, her heart suddenly aching. They understand each other. What it's like in a broken home. Alone. Overlooked by those that are supposed to love you. But while his story was worse, a gilded cage is still a cage. "That's so Huck and Finn of you guys," her tone isn't mocking at all, it's more... adoring.

He chuckles very softly and shakes his head. "Nope. I'm going to promise not to leave you."

He slices the knife very lightly across the palm of his hand, just below the old scar so that a line of blood wells up. He raises an eyebrow at her and wiggles his fingers at her. "Give me your hand."

She looks at him for a moment like he's crazy. He just cut himself! And now he wants to cut her? Ew, blood. But... after a second, she sees the gesture, it's significance sinking in.

Reaching out, she offers him her hand, trust in her eyes.

He sees the crazy look and he sort of expected it but he also sees when that turns to trust. He wasn't sure that would happen. He's very careful, drawing the knife very lightly over her palm so that a thin line of blood wells up against her skin then he turns his hand, pressing his palm against hers.

"I promise never to leave you."

It's cheesy but it made him feel better when he was a kid and he thinks it might help Summer as well. It also takes away some of the worry about being abandoned that he's been struggling with.

"You're stuck here. I'm stuck here."

She winces and sucks in a breath as he cuts her palm, and before she can make a joke about them swapping blood, he says the words that make her eyes lock on his. Tears well up in her eyes and she nods. "I promise I'll stay with you, Atwood."

He keeps a tight hold on her hand and nods then wraps his other arm around her shoulders and pulls her into him in an embrace.

She moves to hug him tightly with her free arm, their hands still joined and pressed between their bodies. A few tears slip down her cheeks, her eyes closing as she presses her face into his neck. And while a part of it is because of the significance of the moment as well as the nightmare. But another part is because she's starting to feel something for the guy who's her lousy boyfriend's best friend, brother.

He moves his hand up her back , threading his fingers in her hair and then slowly glides it down her back. He can feel her tears against his skin. He's started having the same sort of feelings for her and he's been stuffing them down because it's Seth and she's Seth's girl. She has been for most of Seth's life--at least as far as he was concerned. When he speaks his voice is thick with the emotion of all these things.

"It's okay. I'm here now."

She holds him closer, brushing her lips against his skin without really thinking of it as her eyes fall shut. "I'm here too."

Ryan stiffens a moment, thoughts ricocheting around his brain. She's Seth's girlfriend. Seth is practically his brother. She's soft and warm and she's here. Ryan's willpower when it comes to things like this has always been drastically diminished. He craves being touched and held in a way that he'll never try to explain to anyone.

He dips his head slightly, brushing his lips against her shoulder. "I know."

And that will be his downfall, and maybe hers. They're both here while Seth and Taylor aren't.

Summer wants to pretend that the gesture isn't as tender as it is, that he's just kissing her skin was an accident. That the brush of her lips to his skin didn't mean anything either. But it's been months without so much of a sign from either of their significant others. And it feels like they're stuck here forever.

Ryan is here and warm and real. He understands her more than anyone, probably even more than Cohen. And she holds him even tighter, their hands still connected, squeezed tightly. "Stay?"

He hesitates only slightly then nods as he shifts a little and lays down, pulling her with him. "As long as you want."

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sing me to sleep [closed log]

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