[ Two days have come and gone with no sign of his First Officer. Jim hasn't yet showered and only drank water during the search for Spock, and now ... now he simply wanders. The cabinet that hides the hole in the wall between their apartments is shoved aside and hesitantly he enters, looking around. Opening the fridge to find food that will go uneaten neatly packaged and labeled, as if Spock is saving it for later. In his bedroom, Jim finds himself collecting the Starfleet uniform and taking it back to his room to fold in a drawer along with the warm grey coat he initially bought in case Spock returned, all those months ago.
He keeps holding the silver Science pin, thumb rubbing against it absent-mindedly as he slumps in a heap on Spock's sofa. It's so quiet. He tilts his head to ask why, stops and grins as though pained before his expression sinks all over again.
You can't even get your crew home, he thinks, swallowing a hard lump in his throat and blinking back dampness as he stares unseeingly through a chair. He could have been eviscerated and you don't know. After all this time, what happens to people is a mystery. Where do they go? Why are their memories altered when they return? Will he return? And why are you so selfish that you wish he would, compared to granting him his freedom? What are you without your ship, Kirk? ]
You're such an asshole.
[ It's spoken to the empty room without feeling, a murmur bitterly aimed at either himself or Spock for not being around to get in his mind and banish such thoughts. Hell, he just wants Spock nearby, he wouldn't even have to talk. Can't save your friends, Kirk. Well done. Jim passes out hunched on the couch in Spock's apartment, the silver Science Division pin dropping from a curled hand to the floor. Generously, he dreams of nothing, hollowly hoping he will wake up to an annoyed Vulcan.
28th, Absence » closed to Bones
He keeps holding the silver Science pin, thumb rubbing against it absent-mindedly as he slumps in a heap on Spock's sofa. It's so quiet. He tilts his head to ask why, stops and grins as though pained before his expression sinks all over again.
You can't even get your crew home, he thinks, swallowing a hard lump in his throat and blinking back dampness as he stares unseeingly through a chair. He could have been eviscerated and you don't know. After all this time, what happens to people is a mystery. Where do they go? Why are their memories altered when they return? Will he return? And why are you so selfish that you wish he would, compared to granting him his freedom? What are you without your ship, Kirk? ]
You're such an asshole.
[ It's spoken to the empty room without feeling, a murmur bitterly aimed at either himself or Spock for not being around to get in his mind and banish such thoughts. Hell, he just wants Spock nearby, he wouldn't even have to talk. Can't save your friends, Kirk. Well done. Jim passes out hunched on the couch in Spock's apartment, the silver Science Division pin dropping from a curled hand to the floor. Generously, he dreams of nothing, hollowly hoping he will wake up to an annoyed Vulcan.
You lost him inside the stars. ]