Log, Completed~

[hottesthoushi.livejournal.com]

When; Oct. 21, after the Forget-Me-Not curse.
Rating; PG-13, just to be safe. 'Snot bad.
Characters; Sango (boomerang_girl) and Miroku (hottesthoushi)
Summary; Miroku attempts to apologize for forgetting Sango, and has his pleasant conversation with a loved one.
Log;

When Miroku woke up in the morning, he realized something not so good had happened. Nothing was wrong with the apartment or him or anything, but he felt like something was really off, like he'd done something bad... He sat up in his bed and rubbed his eye for a little while, trying to remember what it was... Oh. Oh, crap. Yesterday, he couldn't remember who Sango was! How could he have done something like that?! She was probably furious! He got up quickly and dressed himself - he was fairly certain she would be even more furious if he weren't dressed and he tried to talk to her - before going into the living room. She wasn't there, and he looked cautiously at her door. Would it be worth waking her up to apologize? he wondered. He finally decided it would be - perhaps he would cook a special breakfast or something to apologize to her for it? - and knocked on the door that led to her room.

She'd been floating in that tired, half-waking for quite some time, too warm in her bed and too tired to get up just yet. She'd pretty much run off yesterday, staying away late into the night and returning only when she was positive that the priest was asleep. Even as she slowly drifted back to life, her thoughts had begun to gather and she was treated with a depressed anger. Here was Sango, lying in a very comfortable bed, belly-down with her sad face pressed into a pillow and the blankets pulled high, and then there was a knock on the door of her newly-acquired room. She grumbled low to herself before getting out, "What?" He was certainly not getting manners out of her, not this early in the morning and not after what he'd done the day before. She reached up a hand to pull through her bed-mussed hair as she propped up on her elbows, making sure that blankets were in good places. She wore her usual kimono, but it had loosened itself in the night, and she certainly wasn't going to let him see anything, other than the fact that it was undone. Reservation while attempting to make him severely regret 'forgetting' her.

Miroku winced a bit at her tone. She didn't sound happy, though he hadn't really expected her too. He pushed the door open gently, and tried to give her a smile. "Sango...?" He attempted to keep his eyes on her face, but it wasn't going well - as it usually didn't. She was beautiful looking all disheveled in her bed but she was giving him that look and was clearly unhappy. He had a job to do, to let her know he was sorry, and that he cared for her, and to seek her forgiveness for being stupid.

"I'm sorry," he said finally. "For yesterday. I don't know what came over me, I... This City, sometimes it does things... Maybe that was it...?"

She watched him carefully as he entered, and was able to take only the slightest satisfaction from his wondering eyes. This, however, was quickly cloaked by her frustration with his almost obscenely-male ways. She wasn't happy, and she planned to stay that way, for some reason, for a bit longer.

"You're going to blame forgetting me on the City?" She asked quietly, an edge in her voice did well to veil the sad quality that it held as well. She'd been quite angry earlier, and had mellowed to depression, and was now hovering somewhere in between. "How would I even know about that excuse? The last curse was so petty... Aren't they all?" She trailed off. She did want to believe him, but... "That wasn't something petty, Miroku."

"But Sango," Miroku said, his voice sounding slightly hurt. He hated when she got this way, and he hated it because he knew he'd given her reasons to believe whatever conclusions her mind drew about him. He didn't want her to think bad things, but who could blame her? Miroku rubbed his arm nervously. "They're not all like that..." He took a cautious step forward. "I... Why would I pretend to forget you, Sango? What could I possibly gain from having you upset at me?" He knew what she must have thought, though.

She was wary of his moving closer, and pushed herself up to sit, bringing her legs in front of her and pulling her wrap-around clothing tighter around her. "The way you are..." She paused, looking at him for a moment without quite meeting his eyes, "If I thought that you'd forgotten me..." She changed it, "If I left, you'd be free of me. You wouldn't have me trying to look over your shoulder and watch what you're doing with other women." Another careful pause as she hesitated on her words, and she looked away completely, staring into the opposite wall and nervously playing in the ends of her hair. "If I got upset and hated you; if I left... Then you wouldn't have to marry me. You wouldn't have to worry about being faithful anymore." Though she wouldn't admit it, she was almost always worried about his fidelity. Their affections for each other were practically once-stated, and all on his part, but it was something rushing and not-quite polished. She was nervous.

Right, he had expected that... Hadn't he? It still hurt, though, knowing that that was what she thought of him, even after the proposal... Her thought that he might want to walk out on their agreement hurt the worst. He loved her, wanted to make her his, and no one else could have her - To sit by her side through eternity, in this life and any other that might come along. He had never felt this way about another woman in his entire life, and yet he still fooled around... But that didn't mean he would ever even consider walking out on her. He cast his gaze down to the floor and pursed his lips a little, searching for the right words.

I know why you would think that, but it's not true...

It's my fault you think that, Sango, but I would never...

If I were going to do that - which I'm not - I would choose a different way to go about it, I assure you.

Don't ever think that way, please!

Finally, the words that slipped out came to be something much less articulate and collected than he would have expected from himself -

"Do you really think I'd do that...?"

He was silent for so long... Usually a collected man, admirably straightforward in his words, and the silence only increased her rising nerves. She swallowed back on a rising, stinging lump in her throat, trying to resist her eyes tearing up.

She failed, ultimately, and her voice cracked at she answered him, and she hated being so weak. "I..." Did she think that? Oh, and she terrible if she was actually that afraid, that doubtful. "Y-you wouldn't, would you?" Her watering eyes spilled over, crying without the usual effects of it. She was still remaining as calm as possible. She didn't even know why she was so worked up. Just... Everything and it was all slowly dissolving.

At the sound of her voice, Miroku looked up, and he felt even worse to see her so upset. "No, of course I wouldn't..." He always made her upset, didn't he? nervously, he took another step towards her, and then another. "Never, I would never... Never intentionally hurt you, never leave you, never choose to not have you with me." He swallowed nervously before reaching out hesitantly and taking her in his arms. This stupid City, and its stupid curses. This stupid monk, and his stupid habits.

His voice was getting closer, and her shoulders drew in, curling up as if to protect herself. His words both comforted her and made her feel all the worse. He sounded honest, he usually did, and she still doubted him, and that was terrible. She opened her mouth as if to speak, but it drifted closed again, never uttering.

He was upon her, then, his arms, and they were strong, coming around her and she moved closer without thinking and collapsed into that grasp. She'd been slowly accumulating a stress since her arrival here, and straws had finally leaned enough to break her. "I'm sorry..." Her own doubt troubled her more, now... He was sincere and she was horrible for not believing in that. She was crying now, though she was quiet when she did so, without sobs or proper shaking. Her own arms released her clothing to reach around him and return the embrace. "I... I'm terrible. I'm sorry." She grasped near-desperately, "Thank you."

"Shh..." Miroku tightened his grasp on her and began to stroke her arm with his fingertips as a way to comfort her. She seemed quite often to be very strong, and tough as leather, yet now, as he held her in his arms, it hit him again why he loved her. It was strange to be reminded of this - "Oh, your sobs remind me of why I love you!" - but it was true. She was an amazing creature, multi-faceted and beautiful in each way. As well... She was taking this all on herself. Though it was endearing in some ways, and a clear example of her goodness of character, he had to put a stop to it, if only for this time.

He carefully settled himself on the soft bed and pulled her gently into his lap. "There's no reason to be apologizing to me... You're not terrible, Sango. I'm terrible for even giving you the slightest reason to think that I might be untrue," he said. He held her gently against his body and looked down at her face. "Please don't cry, Sango. It hurts to see you cry."

She settled onto him, using the sleeve of her kimono to wipe at her cheeks. "Yes, I... If it was something the city did, and the first thing I thought was that you were being pig-headed..." That was such a bad thing to think, but the curses and this whole place were confusing and so different. "That's a bad way of thinking, on my part." She wiped at her eyes again, thankful that she wasn't currently wearing the make-up she often used for her eyes.

A deep, quivering breath, and she leaned into him again, face burrowing into the curve of his shoulder. "I must seem so silly..." There was even a self-mocking smile on her face as she tilted to look up at him from an odd angle.

"You're not used to the way the city works," he said simply, smiling warmly down at her. She was really so beautiful...And sitting in his lap, and it was like right there. But now was definitely not the time, he reminded himself. He shifted a little and moved a hand down to lace his fingers with hers, still smiling. "You never seem silly, Sango. I'm sorry that I could lead you to think those things. It's my fault..."

"I seem silly to me." She argued, smiling more genuinely. "It conflicts, I guess, being a demon slayer, a fighter like that, and being a woman." Her digits curled into his own, and she was once again brought to subtly examine him. Even his hands, his grip and his embraces all seemed solid and strong. Curled against him, she could feel the rise and fall of his breath; everything under his layered robes that she'd never seen must've been so strong, so handsome... And she criticized him for being a pervert, while it was true that she'd entertained thoughts that couldn't have been much better. Even her imagination, though, was faithful only to him...

He was educated, too, a good mind and an eloquent speaker. She was trailing into stray thoughts, now, not wanting to think of her own mistakes or even any that he'd ever made. "I was raised around the men, without many girls to play with. I'm just so clumsy at this sort of thinking..."

“One would think so..." Miroku grinned at her. "But it mixed perfectly within you." Feeling her fingers curl around his made him happy, and the smile on her face even more so. It was good to see how comfortable she felt around him, and good to be able to be so relaxed around her. With a pleased sigh, he settled more into the bed and squeezed her hand. "Oh, really?" he asked, smiling. "You're doing quite well."

"You lie." She mock-accused, settling again as he moved. She was still red-cheeked and puffy-eyed, but was starting to feel lightened. Maybe all she'd needed was a good fussing. "If I thought as craftily about it as most girls I've known, I'd have been properly betrothed long ago. Married to some clunk-headed warrior from another village and, at very least, fat-pregnant with a first child." Her lilting, teasing smile faded, and she adopted, for a moment, a thoughtful look. "I'm glad, though..." Her smile spread again, softer as she tilted her head down to regard him through her eyelashes, "That that's not the case."

Miroku pouted slightly at the thought of her belly being round with someone else's child at all, let alone some "clunk-headed warrior" who probably didn't even appreciate her beauty, and probably had thick, dirty hands, completely wrong to be allowed to touch her at all. Her next words were met with a much happier expression, and as he looked down at her, he couldn't hide the incredibly super rare blush spreading across his cheeks. She was adorable, and if it were anyone else he would have thought she did it on purpose.

"I'm glad as well..."

His blush, the thought that she'd said enough to make his cheek's pinken with warmth, made her grin, and his agreeance with her words... She thought for a brief moment that it was probably unhealthy to switch moods so quickly. She was escalated, and shifted to move even closer, sitting up further so that her face was near-even with his own.

She was usually a decently reserved person, even given her odd occupation, so her next movement was something that felt oddly emboldened. Pressing forward just a bit more, she tilted her head and briefly, timidly, touched her lips to his.

It was a shock, feeling her lips against his, and he almost pulled away out of surprise. This certainly wasn't like Sango, but that was definitely not to say he was complaining. His mind settled for a sharp intake of breath, but he quickly regained his composure and pressed forward to meet her lips again, more firmly this time. It was almost as brief, and he pulled away a few millimeters to look at her questioningly. Had he been too bold in pursuing her?

She hadn't even known what, exactly, had seized up her normal manners and run off with them, but Miroku had certainly noticed that the culprit had, indeed, committed the crime. She was beginning to curse herself, to fully accept the fact that being so bold was a foolish thing to do. Kagome, from her world in the distant future, could be so bold. A woman like Sango... That wasn't easily heard of. She was quieted of these thoughts, though, when her lips were seized up by his, by his own movement, and he was watching her now.

It was her turn to wear that taken, musing expression, and she smiled again, turning in her lips as if to taste whatever remained. She began to move again, towards him, but stopped. Suddenly, she was a little unsure of what she was doing... She loved him, admittedly, and oh how she did, but... She'd hit the wall of propriety again. "Miroku..." She whispered, "I'm... I've been saving my purity." She blushed even for saying that, the hand that wasn't in his tangling further into his dark clothing. She took a deep breath, and... She wasn't even clothed right, and they were in bed, and... She was stuck somewhere in between thankfulness and regret for stopping herself. "You... And I do..." She wasn't good at talking like this, and this would probably sound horrible, like she was crazed or something, "I want you." That was breathed out, barely audible, but he was so close, and the warmth and his smell...

"I'm a bit afraid, though... I'm still trying to be brave about it..." Again, she wore an expression that seemed to laugh at herself, but that soon faded. "Soon, and... I want to wait until it's more..." What was the word? If they'd clarified it themselves... But she was still unsure of intentions and ideas, "Official, I suppose." She swallowed hard, near aquiver with the compound of her own admittance.

Miroku's eyes widened at her declaration. She... She was so sweet and pure and honest and it was amazing being in her presence! A million thoughts popped into his head at it (namely, "I want you, too.") but he remained silent and listened to her until she was done, then mulled it all over carefully. More official? Of course, that certainly made sense... And it made sense that she was afraid, too. It was a big step, of course. He held her carefully, protectively when she was finished and started slowly, choosing his words carefully.

"I would wait until the end if you needed it to be ready," he said, softly, finally. "You have no idea how overjoyed I am that someone as wonderful and important to me as you would even consider the thought of giving something so precious to me." He bit his lip, trying to find the right way to express what he wanted to say. It was heavy, what she had just said to him... "I, Sango... If... if you want a wedding ceremony - then by all means, say the word and I will make it happen," he said. "I would never stray from your side, this I can promise you. If you need me to stand on the clock tower and shout to the city that I'm yours and no one else's, I can do that too."

"I promised just the same, didn't I?" She was nearly floor by such a turn for events. She would've hoped that he would have figured her for 'pure', known inside that she would never had had anyone but him. He didn't sound surprised, really, but thankful all the same. She could smile at the fact that there were places, the shiest parts of her, that only he would ever know. For however odd a thought it was, it was somehow precious.

"A ceremony..." She repeated the words, looking away for only a moment before smiling. "Could we?" Not matter how boyishly she'd been raised, all girls, at one point or another, wanted a wedding. Oh, and there was so much she would need... "You'd call yourself my husband? And I could be your wife?" She was beginning to bubble, almost, fill with a giddiness that she usually found annoying in other people. It couldn't be much helped, though.

Miroku chuckled at her enthusiasm, and nodded. "Yes, we can, if that's what you want," he said, giving her a loving smile. "I'll be your husband and you'll be my wife, and everyone will know. We can have as big or small of a wedding as you want." He reached up and stroked her hair, beginning to feel some of her giddiness as well. He would be hers, and she would be his, and only his. "I'll get you the best kimono the city has ever seen," he said.

She smiled wide, her eyes turning almost shyly away. It was what she wanted, and she wasn't concerned about much other than the fact that it happened. They didn't know a lot of people in the city. Well, she didn't know a lot of people. She wasn't sure whom he'd met. InuYasha, Kagome, and Kitty were requirements, surely. The rest...? "I'll leave invites up to you. I don't know anyone here." And if those three were the only ones, so be it.

As for her kimono, "Really...?" She was a simple person, who'd lived a rather ordinary life. Such a promise made her laugh light, for some odd reason, but it was an idea that she liked, just the same. "I'll only be wearing it once, though."

Still, her arms tightened around him again, and she pressed a cheek to his chest. "Thank you, Miroku."

"I don't know many either, but I think I can get enough people to make it a proper celebration," he said, hugging her to him. "And yes, really... A beautiful one, to match you." He leaned down and pressed a warm kiss to the top of her head. "It's going to be great, I promise..."

He felt really wonderful, sitting there with her, planning for their future... But he had come into the room with the possible thought of making her breakfast to apologize, and he hadn't eaten last night for feeling badly. "How about I cook something special to celebrate?" This was a much better reason.

She felt completely consoled, warm and satisfied on most levels. He mentioned food, however, and she seemed to sudden remember a nearly-rabid hunger. "Okay." She said simply, arms reluctantly releasing him so that he could move from the bed and the room. She needed to get dressed properly before she did anything else, and now seemed like a good time to begin that day that already felt quite complete. "I'll come and help in a moment..." She promised quietly, pulling the covers up as if she might try to sneak off and seek refuge within them once more.