Log; complete [backdated]

[erocook-ftw.livejournal.com]

When; Jan 17, a couple of hours after this log.
Rating; PG-13 at most
Characters; Sanji [erocook_ftw] & Nico Robin [blackhibiscus]
Summary; Robin's been missing for several hours, so Sanji goes out to find her. He does, but not in the state he expected. Panic, outrage, and angsting ensues.
Log;

Flight was almost second nature to Sanji now. He normally glided along just above the ground, but certain circumstances required movement far above the teeming City streets.

Robin had left the ship around mid-morning, claiming that she needed time alone to think. While neither Sanji or Zoro thought it was a particularly good idea since she was pregnant and CP9 was on the loose, Luffy had let her go without a second thought. Sanji had spent most of the day in final preparation for the concert that night, shipping the food to the square and making sure it was exactly where Motoko wanted it.

However, as the hours dragged on, the cook grew more and more concerned about the whereabouts of his nakama. After delivering the last dish of food, Sanji took to the sky, his eyes peeled for any sign of Robin.

And then, at last, he spotted her, facedown in a narrow alley. As he descended, he noticed the blood -- blood everywhere, and pouring out of her wounds.

"Shit!" Sanji landed heavily and rushed to the woman's side, rolling her onto her back and lifting up her shoulders. He furiously patted her cheeks with his other hand, trying to coax her back to consciousness. "Robin! Robin, please wake up! Oh, fuck! Robin!"

Comments

[erocook-ftw.livejournal.com]

He didn't respond at first, didn't even smile at her smile. He pulled up a chair and sat at her bedside, reaching out to enfold her hand in his. For a moment he remained like that, silent, then his grip tightened.

"I'm sorry." His voice cracked, and his body was trembling. "God," he brought their hands to rest against his forehead, "I thought you'd died. I thought... I didn't..." Sanji would never be as stony-faced as Zoro. Tears gently pattered onto the bed. "I thought we'd lost you. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I'm so, so sorry."

And he remained like that for another moment, clutching the bedsheet and Robin's pulse, shoulders shaking visibly as he fought to control his emotions. But he'd been scared witless, scared to the point of not knowing what to do.

[blackhibiscus.livejournal.com]

Robin's smile immediately faded and changed into a wide-eyed stare, not expecting such a reaction. Her expression went from shock to sadness, and to utter guilt from there. She quickly leaned forward and lifted his face up, resting her hands on both of his cheeks.

"Don't..." she whispered, her voice strained with emotion, she was on the verge of bursting out in tears. Dear God, what had she done? "Please don't, Sanji."

She wrapped her arms around him and pulled him into a tight hug, never wanting to let go ever again. She was a horrible person. Absolutely horrible. "I'm the one who should be sorry for bringing you this much pain."

[erocook-ftw.livejournal.com]

He returned the hug, relieved that she was safe and sound, content with quieting his sobs while in her arms. When he had calmed, he sat back and smiled awkwardly at her. His gaze fell to nothing in particular -- the mattress, maybe -- and he ran a hand through tousled blond locks.

"No," he said at last. "It's not your fault. I should've been there to stop him. Me or Luffy or Zoro... one of us, any of us. I don't... If you had died, I don't think I would've ever forgiven myself." He reached out and patted her hand. "I'm so glad you're alive, Robin."

[blackhibiscus.livejournal.com]

She looked at him in pain, pain in her heart, at least. No matter what he would say, it'd still feel like it was her fault, it had been her fault all along. She had known that deep down, but it hit her like a truck now and it only made her feel a lot more guilty. When would it stop?

"Being alive is insignificant when I'm nothing but a burden to you all right now," she spoke, clutching his hand, just to hold him, to find some comfort among all her misery. "Still, I'm so glad that you're here with me."

[erocook-ftw.livejournal.com]

"No!" Sanji waved his hands to hush her. "No, no! Don't think like that! You're not a burden and never will be." He didn't want to talk to her about this, not now. Not when she was weak and weary from her attack.

Speaking of which... "Robin." He was growing accustomed to not affixing an honorific at the end of her name. "What happened, exactly?"

[blackhibiscus.livejournal.com]

"I..." Robin searched for the right words, carefully thinking of what to say -- she wanted to keep some things to herself. "He forced me to come with him into that alley, smashed me against the wall a few times... Talked with him for a bit. It was mostly beating, though."

She shuddered and closed her eyes for a moment, not wanting to think about those few humiliating minutes.

[erocook-ftw.livejournal.com]

Hestitantly, the man reached out and stroked her hair. "I'm sorry," he whispered. "For not being there when you needed me." He held her hand tighter. "If you want to tell me, please do. I don't want to... seem apathetic to your situation."

He'd been bothered all the while by Robin's pregnancy already. He didn't want this to pile onto the list of things to brood about.

[blackhibiscus.livejournal.com]

"No, it's alright. I already told you everything that's important," she assured him with the best faked expression of honesty she had. "I just want you to stop being worried about me. I'm doing fine, even now."

She gazed out of the window for a moment before looking at him with a smile. "Shouldn't you tell the others where you are?"

[erocook-ftw.livejournal.com]

Sanji nodded. "Yeah. You're fine now. I shouldn't be worrying." He stood up and opened the window to look down at the square below, where the concert was about to start. He could see the lights turning on, and the first notes of music were drifting up with the breeze.

"I probably should head back now. I'm playing the trombone for a song, and helping out with food." He turned to look back at her. "You sure you'll be all right?"

[blackhibiscus.livejournal.com]

Robin nodded briefly, absently and watched him for a moment, thinking and estimating. He had acted differently towards her all this time and right now was probably a good time to ask him what was going on. She didn't like it when her friends acted towards her this way; it felt like she had done something wrong and she wanted to know what.

"Cook-san, please tell me what's wrong."

[erocook-ftw.livejournal.com]

He stared at her in surprise. What did she mean, tell her what's wrong? Nothing was wrong now that she was safe.

"What do you mean?" he inquired, walking back to her bedside.

[blackhibiscus.livejournal.com]

"You've been acting differently since I told you about my pregnancy," she said, looking at him straightly with a concerned frown. "Please tell me why, because I don't want you to walk around with any of my problems."

[erocook-ftw.livejournal.com]

His face fell into grave sobriety. Silently, he took his seat beside her bed, propped his elbows on his knees, and folded his hands under his chin.

"I can't forgive him," the cook said finally. "I can't forgive him for doing this to you. Okay, so it was a curse. Okay, so you've accepted it now. So you want the baby. I'm happy for you, I really am." He sighed. "But I hate him. No matter how much you -- you love him," he choked on those words, "I hate his guts. I'm sorry, but..."

Sanji dropped his head and ran his fingers through his hair, if only to hide his furious expression from Robin. "It broke my heart, okay?!"

[blackhibiscus.livejournal.com]

"I understand," she said sadly, watching him with an almost grieved expression. And she did understand him, she could imagine the feeling; it must've been agonizing. She took his moving hand and placed it into hers, holding onto it tightly.

"I love you so much, Cook-san," she said, squeezing his hand to emphasize those words. "And please know that whenever a... situation arises where I need to choose, I will choose for you. I will choose for you, for Luffy, for Swordsman-san, for Navigator-san, for Longnose-kun and for Doctor-san," she spoke quietly, She wasn't even entirely too sure of that herself, but she wanted to comfort him. Her own conscience too, maybe.

[erocook-ftw.livejournal.com]

He gripped her hand tightly, not wanting to let go. It already felt like he'd lost her, to Jyabura's love, to Lucci's hate, to the City's unreasonable penchant for throwing its citizens into situations that wouldn't normally happen.

"I love you too," he whispered. He never expected those words to mean what they did at that moment, as he sat there like a forsaken little boy.

[blackhibiscus.livejournal.com]

She smiled sadly and placed her other hand on his cheek; it felt like her heart was going to burst from guilt and sheer emotion. One was the worst feeling in the world, the latter one the best. The contradiction was striking.

"Now go to that concert of yours, I'll be cheering on you from here, alright?"

[erocook-ftw.livejournal.com]

He managed a smile. It was small and sad, but it was still a smile. "All right. I'll do my best." He stood and bowed, kissing the back of her hand in his typical gentlemanly fashion. When he straightened again, his smile was more content.

"I hope you get better soon, Robin-chan," he said quietly. That said, he turned and headed for the door.