tampered | Log: Ongoing

Log: Ongoing

When: Wednesday evening, 9/12
Rating: anticipating R for sex work discussion
Characters: Asher

ivory_gold and House

vicodincrutch
Summary: "Pre-employment physical" for a moody vampire done by a misanthropic genius. This can only end well.
Log:

Asher stopped at the door to Dr. House's office in the Palace and ran his fingers through long hair the color of true metallic gold and sighed unconsciously. As the hair fell back, without thinking, he tipped his head to let that golden fall slide to cover the scarred right side of his face, letting only the unmarred perfection of the left side of his face show.

A physical.

A physical?

He was centuries old and was having a physical because he was admitting that there were things he could not get other ways. At least not without lies between himself and whoever he was with. Money made this whole transaction so much more honest.

Jean-Claude...

Was not there. Was gone. Might never be back.

Enough. Maudlin musings were for home. Not business.

He steeled himself, dropping an emotionless mask over the half-perfection of his face, and entered the physician's office.

He had fed. He was warm. He had a pulse. His heart beat in his chest. Let this doctor show him how skillful he was.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

"I might need to sample that too." House couldn't help the dripping sarcasm. Magic was never an answer, at least not where he was from.

"When I'm done I'm going to use them to flavor my coffee. What's it to you? You've got more."

Asher favored him with an expression of disdain. "Blood and flesh have power. I will not allow them to fall into the hands of someone who might wish to use them against me."

"Like clone you? One is enough, thanks. If it means that much you can have it when I'm finished if you're that paranoid."

Scooting the chair back, he placed the tray of needles and petri dish down beside where the vampire sat.

"Clone?" A thin line appeared between Asher's brows as he frowned for a moment.

"That will suffice. I will take the samples back and dispose of them."

He looked curiously at the items and sighed. This was such a farce.

"They don't live long. Fitting isn't it? I don't have time or patience to raise a baby bloodsucker. The average ones keep me away enough. And the mothers."

One needle and syringe in hand, "So you are going to be a whore."

Asher dismissed the odd comments about baby bloodsuckers. They tasted of facetiousness and meant little to him.

He could guess what was expected with the needle and sighing, held out his arm.

"Those who can...."

Down and in through skin, the needle slowly withdrew blood. Dr. House half expected it to be green. "Do you think you don't have any talents? No, no, wait. You're so talented you want to take it on the road."

Speaking of which, House would have to work his way down. Luckily he had a cup ready.

Asher watched the needle sink into his skin with vague interest. He didn't know enough about human medicine to wonder if his earlier meal's blood would be distinguishable in his veins.

"Do you make a habit of trying to be insulting?" he asked, already knowing the answer. "I see this as expedient. I have another occupation and have few enough needs."

Asher would be very interested to know that House thought he would be using that cup for something.

The syringe filled slowly. After was set aside and capped. "Just part of my charm," House smiled.

Ah the cup. The small clear container was far too small to be used for drinking. Too large to hold pills unless they were for a horse. Dr. House took a hold of the rim, thumb on the exterior, pointer and middle within, and held it out to Asher. "I want you to take this and fill it with a semen. Given that you're a vumpyre," Greg never did have a very good Boris Karloff impression, "you're sterile. Magic cleanly and immune, right great whatever. I want some of this on file."

Asher looked down at the cup and then back up at House. "You want... semen...?"

The doctor had managed to catch the vampire completely by surprise.

"Yes, that's what this is for." The plastic cup waved a little in the air. "The means to obtain it is your doing so I don't have to pay for it."

House candidly smiled at his shock.

"You don't need semen," Asher said after the first blush of incredulity passed.

He wasn't about to tell House that there was no guarantee that he was sterile, although at his age, even with a hot tub, it was highly likely.

Blush out of a centuries old male Jezebel. Imagine that. "Technically we don't need anything. I'm not going to ask you to whip it out right here and now. You'll get a room on your own. Objections?"

"Countless," Asher said after collecting himself and putting a well-practiced neutral mask in place.

"You do not need semen for this exam and I am not providing it."

"For this examination I need to make sure that you are physically acceptable to hit the mattresses. You can't tell me that Little Asher isn't involved in the business. What is the problem?" Now this was heading swiftly toward irritating. The cup came to rest on the counter, still within sight.

Asher gave House blank face and reached for his zipper. "I can show you 'little Asher' and its functionality, but I am not ejaculating in a cup for you. Unless you are... comment dit on? ...taste testing, it is hardly relevant."

The doctor's brow furrowed terrifically in a matter of seconds. He didn't say anything to stop Asher, calling his bluff. Or what he hoped was a bluff. "If you don't like Mr. Cup I'm sure there's a different container around. We can find you a nice graduated cylinder."

Asher wasn't bluffing. He didn't do casual nudity, but he wasn't about to let this man win this odd contest of wills they'd ended up in.

He drew his zipper down, toed off his shoes, and made to draw off his pants and blue silk underwear.

Greg leaned back in the chair, arms crossed. The latex gloves looked peculiar against his overcoat. He didn't say anything but set his jaw.

Shit. Both Ashers.

Asher set his pants and underwear with his shirt and allowed his lips to curve in a smile that didn't make it all the way to his eyes.

"Did you want the rest of the demonstration?"

"I'm not asking for it because I doubt you can get it up. Or any other weird kink you've got rolling around in your skull. Test purposes."

Blue eyes dropped from Asher's smileless gaze, scarred chest...down.

"Then all you need is proof that I can 'perform' on demand. Not ejaculation," Asher said as calmly as if he was not standing nude discussing whether he could get it up and whether he'd be providing the doctor a semen sample.

The scars did trail down toward his groin, trailing in along his thigh and sending threads across his scrotum, but "Little Asher" appeared unmarred.

"If you are considering a sample a waste you are gravely mistaken. This could end up benefiting you as well. Say that someone accuses you of being overly forceful, a simple test of fluid samples would ahead of time prove your innocence." It wasn't just about the examination any longer. House was right. He always was. Fabio cum Dracula was stubbornly trying the status quo.

His anatomy, despite scars, was utterly admirable. Greg supposed that if he looked that good he'd be taking his clothes off at the drop of a hat as well.

"That was not the reason you gave before," Asher challenged. "Now you are looking for arguments to bolster the one you lacked."

"What do you think I meant by 'on file'?" House glared. "Does the demonstration continue?"

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

[my this was a bit ago]

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject