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1inageneration.livejournal.com) wrote in
tampered2009-02-28 01:31 am
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log; ongoing
When; Er. The 27th?
Rating; G. Come on.
Characters; Buffy Summers and Rupert Giles
everheardoftact
Summary; The Watcher and the Slayer discuss some serious things.
Log;
The last couple of days- and more importantly, the encounter with Wesley, had definitely opened up her eyes to more than a few things. More so to the fact that there was almost nothing she could do here, in the City. Any baddies she beat would just respawn the next day like a sick real-life game of pac man. And that was even before Buffy realized the fact that sixty percent of the City could most likely kick her ass.
It was more than a little disheartening.
Not to mention the fact that Dawn was gone and Sam was avoiding her ever since- well. It was starting to feel like the small cozy niche she'd made her was starting to fall apart. No, scratch that. Crash and burn.
Buffy shows up to training on time- if a little bit absentminded and Giles would surely notice that. Mostly because she just nearly walked into a wall.
"Giles? One Slayer, reporting for training duty."
Rating; G. Come on.
Characters; Buffy Summers and Rupert Giles
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Summary; The Watcher and the Slayer discuss some serious things.
Log;
The last couple of days- and more importantly, the encounter with Wesley, had definitely opened up her eyes to more than a few things. More so to the fact that there was almost nothing she could do here, in the City. Any baddies she beat would just respawn the next day like a sick real-life game of pac man. And that was even before Buffy realized the fact that sixty percent of the City could most likely kick her ass.
It was more than a little disheartening.
Not to mention the fact that Dawn was gone and Sam was avoiding her ever since- well. It was starting to feel like the small cozy niche she'd made her was starting to fall apart. No, scratch that. Crash and burn.
Buffy shows up to training on time- if a little bit absentminded and Giles would surely notice that. Mostly because she just nearly walked into a wall.
"Giles? One Slayer, reporting for training duty."
no subject
Should he ask?
"You're very punctual today, Buffy. Disturbingly so, actually. Is something wrong?"
no subject
"I've just been thinking. Is any of this...working? Like, is this even helping?" she pauses for a second before shaking her head rigorously. "Not that I don't appreciate the whole new training regimen. I do. Really. It's just...I don't know."
Seems like there was a lot she didn't know nowadays.
no subject
"Of course it's working, Buffy. Of course it's helping. We're keeping you in form, and...Drusilla is here, so."
no subject
"There's not really a whole lot of use keeping me in form when probably half the city could kick my ass without even blinking."
no subject
If his-- if she was upset, Giles wanted to know why.
He cleared his throat and leaned the heavy weapon against the side of the table, stepping closer to her with arms folded behind his back.
"There is a use. Discipline is a reward all on its own, but you know what, it doesn't matter. Why don't you tell me why you're feeling so unenthusiastic about your training today? I know how much you are naturally disposed to disliking drudgery, but...well, usually you do so look forward to leaving me with giant bruises."
no subject
"Back at home? I was the big news around Sunnydale. The Slayer. Warrior of the people, mythic and defendery- the thing monsters used to run from. That was back when training did something, when we were actually working towards something."
A pause and her face starts to flicker, the non-committal expression she's trying so hard to maintain is currently on a downward slope.
"Here? Giles, I can't do anything here. Even if I could kill most of the things in the city- like you said, they'll come back. And they'll come back pissed. I couldn't help Wesley. I couldn't stop Drusilla from attacking that guy- because believe me, I looked for her."
"I couldn't stop Dawn from leaving." it's barely a whisper and she's stopped pacing and opted for toying with the hem of her shirt, eyes shut tightly.
"I can't keep my friends or the guy I might just really, really like. I can't, I can't, I can't. Are you seeing a pattern here?"
no subject
So Giles tucked her head under his chin and swallowed thickly for a moment, rocking her back and forth and making shushing noises before speaking, well aware that she was a grown adult now and frankly not giving a damn.
"Buffy. Listen to me. We are always working toward something, even if we end up sliding a little down the mountain. But your life is not and will never be futile, even if your power is. And every effort that you make counts toward something, even if it is only defending yourself from muggers or something. Or helping me to retain a sense of relative normalcy for...well, all of us, now. You can. And we will."
no subject
The fact that he gave these hugs so rarely made her appreciate them all the more, and she lets him rock her- not even feeling the slightest bit ridiculous about it as her resolve to not cry breaks down until she wonders if there was ever a resolve in the first place. Because Buffy can ‘deal’ with the best of them. She can shove issues away or stuff them inside herself until the cows come home.
But it’s a big like having something in a bottle under pressure. The slightest crack and she shatters. So, yeah. Buffy can say that she’s ‘alright’ and that she’s ‘really okay with Dawn’s leaving’, but she knows it’s a lie, and Giles does too.
“Only you would mention muggers during a heartfelt moment, Giles.” She gives a hiccoughy sort of laugh and wipes her eyes for a moment. “I know. Or I should know.” A pause, and then-
“But I’m not ready to do this without you.”
no subject
She could cry all she wanted.
"I'm not going anywhere. Where would I go? We'll manage this, and while we manage, we will live our lives just as we have been. You may not be able to hold a candle to some of the creatures here, but you're still a hero, Buffy."
no subject
Just like her dad used to. The gesture is oddly comforting in that way as he smoothes her hair down and makes her wish her mom was here because really, it’s her mother that’s the strong one. The adults always seem to know what to do- and when is she going to be like that? When is she going to wake up and suddenly have all the answers?
“At first, it was nice, being here. No more doom and gloom and death and apocalypses to deal with. But now? Now I want out. That’s why I’ve been going down to the Underground, Giles. There’s a clock down there, and I just have this feeling that it means something. The clock and the ticking are related, the clock and the carousel are related. Everything’s all tied into the magic here, and maybe if we could do some more digging we might be able to find a way out.”